Jada Buisson – Co-founder – Blog – Self-Mastery – 10 min read
Loving yourself is a deeply personal and ongoing journey that involves nurturing your physical, emotional, and spiritual well-being. The first step towards change is always the hardest but many times the most necessary. If you are here, you probably noticed an area in which you can improve. Please use this as a guide not a perfect recipe.
Why Should I Even Love Myself?
Self-love has been marketed as this big radicalising self obsession journey in which you just change how you perceive yourself from one day to the next with the help of “these special rose quartz and a bit of subliminal message videos”. But in reality, there is no finish-line to cross to know you truly love yourself. And, it isn’t constant or permanent. Certain days will be easier than others. And most importantly, it comes from inside of you. The same way you can appreciate others through thick and thin you can learn to see yourself as more than an enemy or even just a side character.
But, why SHOULD you love yourself? Well, simply put, no one else can love you for you. This means that no matter how much another person pours love into you, if you cannot even stand to be around yourself (whether this includes drowning out thoughts or modifying yourself considerably), you will never feel full and satisfied with the love they give. But more importantly, wouldn’t it be so much easier to have that extra person on your side? The one who knows you inside out?
So, here are a few ways to start loving yourself from the inside out:
The Power of Self-Awareness
Starting on the path of self-love begins with mindfulness. Observe your thoughts, feelings and actions without judgement. Begin to notice what makes you smile or what makes you feel uneasy. This will help you be more aware of your inner experiences and actions. Once you have a better understanding of yourself, you can start taking steps toward treating yourself with more kindness and respect.
A good way to start with this is by starting to journal. This may be hard at first but remember that it does not need to be perfect. This means that if you only write once a week or feel the need to write down all your thoughts, just starting to recognise your experiences and inner world is a powerful first step.
The Power of Self-Compassion
Treat yourself with kindness and understanding, especially during difficult times. Imagine you are speaking to a friend or family member and approach the situation with yourself the same way you would with them. Replace self-criticism with self-compassion, acknowledging that you are human and deserving of love and acceptance. It is ok to seek support at any stage but you may especially need it at first so reach out to supportive people around you or even the help of a professional (possibly a therapist). sharing your struggle can help you feel validated and understood.
Start recognising and celebrating your strengths, talents, and accomplishments. Focus on your positive qualities and achievements, and appreciate the unique attributes that make you who you are. This will make it easier to then establish healthy boundaries in your relationships and prioritize your own needs and well-being. Learn to say no to things that drain your energy or even compromise your values, and surround yourself with people who respect and support you.
The Power of Self-Care
Prioritise self-care activities that nourish you: body, mind, and soul. Engage in activities that bring you fulfilment and relaxation whether it’s taking a walk in nature, unplugging and disconnecting from technology, or indulging in a hobby you love. Start cultivating an attitude of gratitude by focusing on positive aspects of your life. This can be done through creating a gratitude journal.
The Power of Forgiveness
Let go and accept your past mistakes and regrets. Understand that making mistakes is a natural part of being human, and use them as opportunities for growth and learning. This means you must try to accept yourself fully, flaws and all. Embrace your uniqueness and recognise that you are worthy of love just as you are. You can also pay attention to your inner dialogue and challenge negative self-talk with positive affirmations and empowering beliefs.
Remember that self-love is a lifelong practice that requires patience, persistence, and self-awareness. Be gentle with yourself as you embark on this journey, and know that you are deserving of love and happiness just as you are.
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